Archive for June, 2008

Photoshop Fun: If Tattoos told the Truth

Cracked’s new list is up! I came in #5! Hurray for satisfaction! Now I want money.

They’ve got a new contest that anyone with MS Paint can enter if they’re up for it.

Here were my entries for the last one:

June 26 2008 | Humor, Photoshops | No Comments »

Greatest TV Moments?: When Improv goes Wrong

I’m not yet sure if these quality for the greatest TV moments, but DJ_Canadian and Justas in the forums wanted to nominate these videos from “Whose Line Is It Anyways.” Unlike other TV videos I’ve posted, these ones haven’t been quoted or referenced to death yet, but I like ’em. They’re worth a laugh.

First up: someone gets hurt, and something gets broken.

And then the gauntlet was thrown down: a musical number goes horribly awry when Wayne Brady tries to spell “Howard.” And they never let him forget it.

June 25 2008 | TV, Videos | No Comments »

RIP, my most excellent friend.

Comedian George Carlin, famed for his routines about drugs and dirty words, died of heart failure at a Los Angeles-area hospital Sunday, a spokesman said. He was 71.

Carlin, who had a history of heart and drug-dependency problems, died at Saint John’s Health Center in Santa Monica about 6 pm PDT (9 pm EDT) after being admitted earlier in the afternoon for chest pains, spokesman Jeff Abraham told Reuters.

Known for his edgy provocative material, Carlin achieved status as an anti-establishment icon in the 1970s with stand-up bits full of drug references and a routine called “Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television.”

Carlin’s comedic sensibility often came back to a central theme: humanity is doomed.

June 23 2008 | Pop Culture, Videos | No Comments »

Quieting Down…

I think it’s been more than 30 days of blogging already, but I think I’ve gotten into a good habit of this now. I’ll still update, but more on a day-to-day ratio now that I’m getting things back into order.

Things seem to be quieting down for me, but only because I’m on the verge of a lot of changes right now and I’ve managed to achieve a lot of goals in this last month. I’m almost done with TSL, and I’ll probably have the epilogue animations for VSB done within the month. No word on when the games will come out but I’ll keep everyone updated. Then at work, I’ve gotten an entire notebook full of tasks fully crossed off after so many months. Reliiiiiieeeef. For now.

Monday I’m starting with an evening program that’ll be taking up all my nights for the next four and a half months. So if I happen to go days without blogging again – don’t worry, I’m not dead. Unless I am. Then in two weeks comes the dreaded wisdom teeth removal. I’ll be trading in that pain in my mouth for another kind. The plus side: lots of ice cream, TV, and sleep.

Happy stuff: Been going to improv a lot lately. I love those shows. Also discovered the awesomeness of Dadeo’s, a New Orleans-style diner with deep-fried everything. Then there’s a ton of movies I’ve been meaning to review that I should get around to before nobody cares anymore. But so far, I like them all. Right now I’m just sacked out on the couch in front of a fan listening to “I, Robot.”

If anyone wants something stupid to do, we’ve got this great thread started in the forums and everyone’s free to join. If you suck at Photoshop or like drawing dongs on things, all the better. Get in enough entries and I’ll make a video out of it. Do it.

If you enjoyed my blog, please click those advertisements you see around here and see all the awesome merchandise my sponsors sell. They won’t pay me until I get enough clicks and I’m not even a tenth of the way there.

Hmmm… my TV just changed channel on it’s own.

Anyway, it’s been a great time blogging, even if it has been a little pointless. Did I forget to mention how awesome you guys are? Thanks for reading!

June 21 2008 | Daily Life | No Comments »

Kokanee Ranger: Don’t pull me into your politics!

I’ve only been familiar with the Ranger vs. Sasquatch commercials for the last few years. I thought it was some age-old thing from the 80’s, but no – the schtick is recent. Sasquatch steals a case of Kokanee beer and rides off on a dirtsurfer with the Ranger chasing after him. Now, for the last year, the world has come down with an unexpected case of “Ranger: Live or Die” ads which happen to be popping under my mouse every time I visit a new site and asking me to vote.

Do I really care? No. The commercials are mediocre at best. I’d sooner give a crap about the fate of the Geico Gecko. In any case, I voted yes on the website while researching this thing for two simple reasons:

1. Getting of the old ranger means they’ll bring in someone “younger and hipper.” And anyone who’s both “young” and “hip” is destined for douchebaggery. So instead of getting commercials about a pervy old man in the woods with babes, we’ll get some pervy young guy in the woods with babes, and that’s not cool if that guy isn’t me.

2. The Kokanee Ranger isn’t a real person. The guy playing him is. What the commercial’s asking us to do is vote on whether or not they should fire the actor. That’s not nice. The guy’s probably got bills to pay. If letting the Ranger live is what’s going to keep this creepy old guy off the streets, then by all means – let the Ranger live.

June 19 2008 | Pop Culture, TV, Videos | 1 Comment »

Some Random Videos

I’m lazy today, so I’m posting some videos I found in the forum and other websites.

Here’s a Japanese gameshow where people jump hurdles on treadmills. Needs more fat people.

Here’s South Africa showing the world that they’ve been having it!

And finally: the Retarded Policeman.

June 18 2008 | Videos | No Comments »

TechnoBuzz: Real-Life Super-Powers

Luis Prada at Cracked has just come out with this sweet list of Super-Powers Science Will Give Us In Our Lifetime. That list includes invisibility cloaks, robots suits, and super-velcro, so check it out.

My ideal super-power would be telekenesis. Not that lame “spin a pencil on the table” crap, or the “turn on your car from outside” stuff on that list. I’m talking about an all-out Jean Gray-style “Oh f**k, Oh f**k, we’re all going to die” telekinesis. TK is the Everything power. Flight, lifting heavy objects, defense against bombs and bullets, fire-starting, head-exploding – if you’ve seen X3, you know what I’m talking about. I want to scare the piss out of people when I levitate Edmonton out the ground and fly it south for the winter. Of course, science will probably never provide me with that luxury, but I can always hope for a magical bolt of lightning to hit me.

Something they left off that list is levitation. I read a while back that they reversed something called the Casimir effect and now they can levitate tiny objects. They’ll move onto bigger things eventually, and It won’t be long before we start getting our own anti-gravity belts. Flying vehicles will probably be a big next step too, but they’ll probably only reserve that technology for emergency services like ambulances and fire engines. I can’t see today’s drivers ready to take on the skies yet. They get into enough accidents driving on flat surfaces.

June 16 2008 | Geek Talk, Humor | No Comments »

What to do when you spill the pickle jar.

I’m passing on some good advice I just got from my parents that even Google couldn’t provide.

Step 1. Don’t Panic. If your pickles are still in the jar, they’re still good for another month.
Step 2. Towel up all the pickle juice.
Step 3. Sprinkle baking soda everywhere you wiped.
Step 4. After some time, mop up the floor with hot water and bleach.
Step 5. Wash your socks.

Fairly simple and obvious, but at least there’s a net entry for it now.

They also told me I could get rid of that buffalo chicken smell in my microwave by cooking lemon juice in a bowl in there for 3 minutes. Is this passed-on knowledge, or just stuff they experimented with back in the day?

On an unrelated subject, I’m watching Jurassic Park right now, and I can’t think of any reason why Mr. Hammond thought he needed to bring a mathematician to an island full of dinosaurs. Was it to calculate how much fun everyone would have?

June 15 2008 | Daily Life, Food, Movies | 1 Comment »

William Shatner Speaks

There. To round out my Star Trek posts, here’s a clip from “Just for Laughs” that I caught just before going to bed last night.

June 14 2008 | Geek Talk, Humor, Killing Time, Videos | No Comments »

“Wall-E could kick your ass!”

It’s Incredible Hulk Day today, so here’s a clip from Jimmy Kimmel last night.

June 13 2008 | Humor, Killing Time, Movies, TV, Videos | 2 Comments »

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